Monday, January 23, 2017

Release Day & Book Review: Chasing Fireflies by Paige P. Horne

Chasing Fireflies
by Paige P. Horne
Release Date:
January 23rd, 2017


People say young love never lasts. They say you should wait and grow up first, you should figure out who you are. But those people didn’t know us. They didn’t know that she didn’t like shoes and Christmas was her favorite time of the year. They didn’t know that she liked to feel the cold dirt run through her fingers and floppy hats were a must when planting flowers. Curly People say young love never lasts. They say you should wait and grow up first, you should figure out who you are. But those people didn’t know us. They didn’t know that she didn’t like shoes and Christmas was her favorite time of the year. They didn’t know that she liked to feel the cold dirt run through her fingers and floppy hats were a must when planting flowers. Curly hair was meant to be wild and Fireflies were meant to be chased. Paint wasn’t just for walls and ceilings but for noses and skin.

Our love was the rarest kind of love and I held onto it with everything I had. But you see, Sara Williams wasn’t in control of her choices. Her mind betrayed her and was her hearts worst enemy. Sometimes we are only meant to have a certain amount of time with the person we love. Sometimes a lifetime isn’t enough. But you take what you’re given and you make the best of every moment. This is a story about love, life and never giving up. This is a story about a woman who tried to be better for a man and a man who loved a woman more than his next breath. This is a story about us… Sara and Cash Williams.

About the author:

Paige P. Horne lives in Georgia with her husband and two dogs. She is a lover of books and writing. Since she was a child, she has always loved to dive into the amazing world of imagination and now she gets to create worlds of her own and share them with readers. She has two day jobs, but that doesn't stop her from following her passion. For more info on Paige and what she is up to, follow her on Instagram and Facebook.


My Review:
I actually don’t even know what to say right now. I’ve read all of Paige’s other books and I loved all of them for how excellent and emotional they’re written. This book took me on the emotional journey of Cash and Sara, and their story touched me deeply. One may say they lived no easy life because it wasn't normal what they had to deal with on a daily basis but who's to say what's normal? Of course it's not easy to live with a mental health disorder and it is not normal in society standards but it was their life and their kind of normal and even though they may have wished for better times (because who doesn't?), it was enough for them. They were enough for each other.

'”You are enough. You've always been enough.”'

You know how I felt when I read this book? It was like driving just a few miles per hour on an unknown narrow and bumpy road way up high on a mountain in pitch black darkness, constantly worrying on what lies ahead and fearing of making the wrong move and tumbling down over the edge of the cliff. The constant fear of what might happen in the next seconds, minutes, hours or days is so much stress on the human body that it tries everything to shut it out with hope. People hope for the best and wish for better days. We desperately want to make everything good which is no easy task so we become restless and the feeling of hopelessness settles in. Okayyy, now I'm straying from the topic, sorry for that. I think you get the idea of how I felt during this read =P Let's just say there was a dark shadow lurking overhead just waiting to bring darkness and destruction but I held onto the hope and light for as long as possible. – Just like Cash did.

I cried already at the author's dedication "To all those who suffer in silence. You matter." THANK YOU!

The blurb brought me to tears, so you can imagine how I handled the book. It was an emotional rollercoaster. Reading about Sara’s struggles and Cash’s helplessness nearly broke me, but the story also had really good moments which made me smile although it never lasted for long.
'"Why can't I be happy all the time?" she whispers to me, like it's a secret. But in a way, it is. Sometimes it's hard for the girl I love to get out of bed, and there are times that she only does it for me. But there are also times when I'm not even enough to fight the darkness away.'
If you haven't noticed already, I'm a REALLY emotional person. So let me give you a heads up that even if you don't cry as easily as I do, you will most certainly be moved by this Story.

The Story:
Sara and Cash have known each other since they were kids but not everybody was happy when they got married. They didn’t care though about what others said because they had a love so deep for each other, not everyone's lucky enough to find such love in life. It’s an unconditional and endless love, a love so strong that conquers Sara’s illness at least most of the time. But a person can only hold out for so long until breaking and then one can only hope to find a way to get up again.
'”My love for you makes me who I am. Without it I'd be a different person. Just as the ocean would be different without the waves, the blue sky without the sun, the darkness without the light. You are my other half. You are what makes me … me.” I shrug, looking down at her. Her baby blue eyes are filled with tears, and I can say for sure this time that they are happy ones. I kiss her nose, and she closes her eyes. Tears roll down her cheeks, and she wipes them away before she sniffs.'

I love Paige P. Horne’s writing. I would read any of her books even without knowing what they're about because her stories touch me so deep, especially this one was really personal to me.

This story gives us a glimpse into Sara’s and Cash’s life and what it means to live and deal with a mental health disorder. It shows us their daily struggles and ups and downs of Sara’s illness. It's an illness that affects everyone around her and is a constant struggle for her partner too because he always worries. She can go from happy to sad in seconds and when she's hurting it can end terribly. This is a human's nightmare. Not being able to control oneself, being dependent on medication and other people. Often not even realizing what you do and what's going on. The feeling of helplessness is overwhelming. There is no cure but a constant battle even though there is help to try to make it better.
'She hurts, and I do, too. Our hearts beat the same rhythm, and our souls are made from the same star, but her mind fights it and it ruins us both.'

Sara means everything to Cash. She's his whole world and there is nothing he wouldn't do for her. He loves her no matter what and wants just the best for her. I was blown by how intense, deep and unconditional his love was for her. Any woman would be unbelievably happy to find a guy like him. He was so strong dealing with everything thrown his way where a lot of people would've stepped away already, he was there and never backed down even though he had some rough patches here and there.
'I love her on the outside, like I love her on the inside. Deep and hard, rough and soft. Life-changing and earthshattering. She's everything, and I tell her over and over.'

This was such an emotional story. I loved everything about it even the sad parts. The secondary characters were just perfect. I liked that the author didn't shy away from the bad and ugly of this topic and dealt with it so beautifully.
“I'm a burning house, and you're stuck inside. Soon I won't be anything but ash, and I'm going to take you right down with me.”

Although this wasn't my first book dealing with bipolar disorder, it was one of the best I've read so far. It was realistic and I felt everything of what this couple went through as when it were my own.

Well, with a story like this, dealing with such sensitive topic you kinda have to expect everything. So, be prepared for good and bad feelings, overwhelming emotions, dark and heavy thoughts as well as lots of sudden mood changes but also sweet and tender Moments.
'”Who's to say anyone's relationship is healthy? We all got our shit to sort. It's not giving up on each other when the shit sorting gets tough – that's what matters”'
-- I received an ARC of this book from the author in exchange for an honest review. –

My Rating: 5 of 5 stars

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